The Skin of Our Teeth

Now I realize why I've never completed my list of 100 greatest video games of all time before.  It is quite a headahce and here's only some of the problems

1. The sheer magitude of games. The upper echelon of prefect games, those games so heavenly you know God had a hand in their design -- Miyamoto-san as an agent of God -- that level is actually decent sized. I mean we've been making games for over 3 decades now. You'd hope we'd get it right every now and then.  But after them there is a complete myriad of games that aren't quite there but are damn damn good, near-perfect or at least worthy of mention. It's a pain to shift through them picking what makes a game more worthy than another when in reality, they are fairly damn close in every factor.

2. PC games and arcade games.  I grew up in the console age. I've owned several Ataris and then at least one system from each of the console generations, I've played every single console and handheld released in North America. Yeah I was into computers and computer gaming but then shortly after Myst made CD-ROM media the standard, System specs for PC games went through the roof quicker than you could build a new roof.

I've played most of the ones that matter but I'm not as well versed in PC gaming. When you start adding PC games to the list, it gets convaluted and they start taking up a lot of spots. First Person Shooters also clog up the top 10 and let's face it, I'll admit the my least favourite genre is the FPS. But I've got to give Doom, Castle Wolfenstein, Quake, Half-Like and all their subsequent sequels very high spots and I don't feel like doing that.  PC gaming on its own you can do a damn solid top 100, probably even 500 and be stretched to find an average title amongst those 500.

So for that fact, I may do a separate top 100 for the PC games, but right now the games will only include console releases. It does sadden me because of the work of Sid Meier is thrown out the window, Will Wright 's only great contribution ported to the consoles was SNES's Sim City -- let's face it the Sim City 2000 ports to the PSX and Saturn weren't that good and have you played any of the Sims 1&2 console ports, it's just really NOT the same thing at all. I'm going to lose Maniac Mansion: Day of the Tentacle, a game few people seem to know, and with that its cousin Sam  & Max Hit the Road is also saying bye-bye. System Shock II was the first game to scare the shit out of me since Castlevania II: Simon's Quest and it's now absent. So much great stuff is jettisoned in getting rid of the PC titles that's why I think I'll make a second list.

As for arcade games and ATARI -- most of the good arcade games have been ported, with mixed results but the ones that haven't are jettisoned in favor of just going with consoles. Plus the arcade market in North America hasn't been revelant in almost a decade -- which is a crying shame but the way the cookie crumbles with console systems acheiving mass popularity. 

Atari was really just built on ports of popular arcade games of the time (yes I know it had its own original titles, I'm just making a statement for the board amount of Atari releases) and I understand its history and its importance. For fuck sake's I owned two Atari iterations and played both of them well into 1996. There are some solid games on there that we always need to remember but the majority was a load of crap. While it again pains me to set aside Miner 49er from this list I think most of you are sick of hearing how important Mrs. Pac-Man, Pac-Man, Joust, Space Invaders, Asteroids, Pit-Fall mean to the gaming community.  I know some of you bucks are young -- for you born after 1985 go find an Atari and take the games for a spin (no emulation or special GBA or PS2 collection, doesn't do justice) and just appreciate them while I go on with this next sentance -- for those of us born before, we understand what those games mean and blah blah nostalga blah blah we know what they mean and I'm not wanting to sit there and hit you again over the head with a hammer saying Pac-Man is great. You know. For those young bucks out there -- yeah, I know -- those games weren't that great. Great for the time but I want to think in two decades we've at least pushed out 100 games better than Joust. Pac-Man/Mrs. Pac-Man no matter how old still remain fun and amazing but you can find them as little easter eggs in today games or you can easily find it for free online somewhere. Space Invaders and Asteroids h ad their charms but give me Star Fox any day of the goddamn week.  

I use to think of myself as REAL old-school (and granted if we were doing a list with PC games, I probably would be all over Zork and text-based games near the top over stuff that at least has graphics) but the more and more I form the list the more and more I realize, we're moving forward. Yes, it seems like games were much better then but look at the quanity. How many goddamn games come out in a year now? How much more accepted is gaming that every single product lisence has a video game attached to it -- fuck sake's Hello, Kitty and Barbie have games. There's a lot of shitty garbage that is pushed out every year. In 2005 there was probably more garbage than ever and 2006 isn't starting off great -- who the fuck is Mark Ecko? But for every Barbie Horse Adventures or Getting Up: Contents Under Pressure, there's at least Resident Evil 4 or Kingdom Hearts II or Advance Wars DS or Aria of Sorrow or Prince of Persia that makes shifting through the crap worth while.  If you're not smart enough to realize that you need to stay away from Getting Up or Rollar Rescue or a movie adaptation of Narnia, then honestly shut the fuck up when you say games were better back then. 

There's a slew of bad games that that statement is correct for but the good games that come out today don't disrespect them like that. "oooh but games are more challenging back then!" Put Ninja Gaiden Black in and shut up. Most games back then were harder to beat not because they were better made or more well thought out, it was because the designers usually didn't play test their games for balance.  If you've legitly beaten Battletoads or Mega Man I pat yourself on the back, but those games weren't harder because of better quality.  And stop lying, only like two people ever beat Battletoads without Game Genie and upon doing so they became celestrial spirits. And I haven't even beat Mega Man without the pause-glitch trick. If you've done it without (and without GG) then I would like to arrange a meeting to just shake your hand.

Either way, the bench mark of Super Mario Bros. has been set as the beginning of this list's time frame.

Oh and let's get one other thing straight -- Pong sucks. It was amazing for its time because it was in your home on your TV screen but honestly, I'd rather watch gay porn than play Pong for an hour. The back and forth and the bleeps are just murderous to the senses. If you're looking for a competitive two-player sport that takes no skill go get a nerf ball and go outside. Or learn real ping pong.

3. Mario, Zelda, and Metroid -- oh my! Let's face it, pretty much every Zelda title (sans the Phillips CD-I abbortions that I spent most of my grown up life trying to find just for geek's sake), Metroid title, and Mario title deserves a spot on the list some where. That's why I'm always going to be a Nintendo fan. Because when you buy a game from each franchise you know you're getting a game that's going to be pretty much a fucking classic to keep in your library.  Can't say that for X-Box. All you can say for X-Box is Halo and a bunch of games you can get on another console. As long as Mario, Zelda and Metroid are exclusive to Nintendo -- which will be forever -- then I'm Captain N.

Most of you are saying right now, "but what about Link's Adventure or Metroid II!!!" Both are considered the black sheep of their respective franchise's family tree. But that should show you how good the other games are in the family but even then they are amazing games. Link's Adventure is so radically different it throws people off but it was a solid damn title and laid the ground work for many of the conventions that the series today couldn't do without.

People bitch that Metroid II is too linear. Ugh. Other than a couple 'sequence breaks' (a term that the Metroid series has coined) aren't all Metroid games....and well most games in general linear? Got to go from point A to B to C sometime. The game was a challenge and I know without it I would have never survived the summer road trip my parents took all over Kentucky, eastern Illinois and Indiana researching our genalogy. A summer is stuffy small city county libraries isn't bad but as a kid, you get sick of reading at some point.

Mario is Missing and Luigi Mansion == no good. Any game starring Luigi over Mario is going to fail. Mansion did well as it was one of the launch releases and it has its charms but once through is enough.  And when you play the game straight through and beat it in the course of a Sam Goody's Demo machine that resets itself at intervals to kick you off -- that's a bad sign. Mario Super Strikers was also a dissapointment but Mario Golf and Mario Baseball both have been gems. Mario Party is usually worth its weight (though admittedly the GCN versions are a bit lacking). So Mario does have some blemishes on his record but so many hits we'll over look Luigi's misadventures.

But then you have Harvest Moon, Castlevania, Mega Man, Final Fantasy....ect. Series that have gotten too large -- sometimes for their own good. Hell Mega Man has gotten too long not only in its series but in two spin-offs. Deciding which from each series makes the grade is a bit more difficult this time around.

4. Imports. I've played tons of imports in my day though I haven't played nearly even a fraction of all the goodie stuff that is in Japan but not here. So it wouldn't make me qualified to just put a small amount of imports on this list so all imports are absent. Which brings up two cases of Final Fantasy. Honestly, Final Fantasy III is hands down one of the best FF games in the series but it's still the only one never released in America. A port to the Nintendo DS is rumoured to be in the works but who knows when that'll come out.  So I'll make special mention of it on the list but it won't actually get a real spot.

Final Fantasy V HAS been released but as part of a ported collection on the PSX that just doesn't do the game enough justice. For that I'm going to list it seperately from it's Anthologized partner Final Fantasy VI. It will be the only import case to get such treatment.

5. Public Opinion.  Most people annoint games as great fairly quickly. Resident Evil 4 I think deserves it but I've heard rave reviews already for stuff like Chibi-Robo, which is fun but yeah -- the night/day reset and the battery thing get annoying. Public Opinion also puts Final Fantasy IV and Donkey Kong Country as great games. BAD DOG!! BAD! Miyamoto put it best when he said (parapharsed) that DKC is proof that players would put up with medicore game play if the graphics were good.

FFIV will probably make the list -- don't know, haven't finished it -- so I'll tackle it's inadequecies either then or some other time if it doesn't make the list.  To me, it's the weakest of the FF games but it still means a lot to American gaming which leads into the next point....

6. What weight should innovation play? All games should be innovative, especially the classic ones. They all need to do something that furthers the genre. Every console RPG owes Dragon Quest er Warrior it's soul -- even anything with the Final Fantasy lable. By sheer innovation alone it has to make the list right?

Go pop Dragon Quest in again. Like most of you, I got DQ by subscribing to Nintendo Power magazine. They over anticipated the revolution it caused in Japan and over-produced localized North American carts.  They over-produced so much that they bite the bullet and lost money by just giving them away as a freebie for the magazine. Ouch. Done playing it? You could be. It's only five towns and dungeons. It's a game that would spark a series that Japanese parliament has passed laws prohibiting Dragon Quest games from coming out on days other than weekends and Holidays because students and workers were skipping school and work to stand in line to acquire the game. If you start something that large it's worth a spot on the top 100 you'd assume.  It has it's charms and it's one-on-one combat. Who can forget the first time they encounter a blue Slime? "No one" is the correct answer, but honestly we've improved on the formula since. Dragon Quest will be represented in the countdown, just in later editions.

7. Making the list my own and unique. Several publications have already attempted and completed such lists. They're damn good lists. They had several minds working together to produce the feature. I'm one man and I haven't played all the games in the world -- but when someone says something's a classic I seek to try it out. So I've done fairly well. But making my list unique from their's is a problem. Honestly on sheer units sold, influence, and fun factor -- Tetris should be number one logically but it's not going to be here. Yeah you can argue but oh well. So where do I draw the line in being unique and just being for "shock" value? It's hard.

The list will be coming, just it's going to take some time to make. Got any suggestions or sound offs or just want to chat about helping on the list? There's the comment box.

 

Yeah, this is my third entry of today. If interested, scroll down for the other two entries. One being on the comic book releases for this week and the other being a worthless musing on the NCAA tourny. Nothing exciting.

This one won't be exciting either. But the announcement of a project that will premeate through this blog for quite a while I can only imagine. It is a debate that has been on the back burner for some time and a list I'm going to complete -- the 100 greatest video games of all-time. Yeah, magazines have already done it but they're wrong so. Meh. Still trying to decide whether to include all video games or just to limit it to console gaming or to just PC gaming.  Most likely it's just going to be console only but who knows. Probably do one or three or five a post. Depends what I feel like. It's my list but you're more than welcomed to bitch. Most of those people who know me will already know what game is hands down number one so we'll call it the list of 100-2 though I'll hide number one from those who don't yet know it and I hope no one posts it on the comments or I will remove it.  Just for those thinking they do know it -- it's not a game you'd think and it's not a Mario game. Sorry.

You guys can also start posting your lists of your favorite games in the comments section if you would like.

 

Looking at the comic list this week it's again a fairly small mainstream week.

Batman #651 continues will part two of eight "Face the Face." I'm a bit torn. It's a Batman arc being written by James Robinson over both Detective Comics and Batman.  It's sure to be collected. I'd put money that it'll be released in trade. After all it's the first arc for Batman coming out of One Year Later.

The first issue (in Tec two weeks ago) was loads of fun albeit nothing happened through the entire duration of the book but the story won't be wrapped up until June, and knowing it will be collected, I really don't feel like flopping down $2.50 times 8 even for James Robinson when I can just get it collected in like December for $19.95. I'll flip through it to see if there's anything I like.  But damnit, it's Batman, it's Robinson, KGBeast made an appearance (albeit perhaps his last, as he's killed off a couple years too late), Harvey Dent and Two Face are both back, Posion Ivy has received a power boost, Commisioner Gordon's back, Robin and Batman are back together and chummy again....it has every damn thing I've wanted the past two fucking years and I'm telling myself not to pick it up? I just hate myself.

Catwoman #53. I've picked up random issues of Catwoman but honestly my longest stretch collecting this volume was the three issues that contributed to War Games. I like Selina and I love Ed Brubaker but even Bru couldn't get me interested enough to hold on to the title. Not sure I like the idea of her and Bruce together, but the mind-wipe angle was brillant although seen a mile away. And even then, I do hope there's still a bit of good in Selina despite the mystical Zantanna labotomy and where the last issue left off. Even for a former villain, it felt out of character and against what we've come to expect from her.

I'll pick up the title only because i'm interested in the mysteries it presents. Who is the father of Selina's baby? Why is she laying low with a new name? Who is the new Catwoman?

OYL has been a lot of fun and a blast, but sadly the mysteries have been fairly obvious to figure out. They gave us Ollie being Mayor of Star City -- so I don't understand why Judd Winnick treated the fact as if it was a big secret, revealing it on the last page. Wait, that's because Winnick is becoming quite a hack the past year. Jason Todd being the Twin Nightwing was fairly obvious -- although it's a bit ambigious to which Nightwing is who in last week's Nightwing #118. Robin being framed from the murder of Batgirl, also again something we could figure out quicker than a maze on a kid's placemat from Denny's. And I still don't know why you put Cassie through all the shit at the end of her title just to kill her off as soon as the OYL jump happened.

So the Catwoman mysteries -- it's most likely Slam Bradley being the father, but Bruce would still be cool although unlikely, I'm throwing out the Black Mask being the father just as a twist but it's a goddamn moonshot. The new Catwoman is her little buddie. As for why she's lying low, just something tells me the murder of Black Mask is too simple.  Hope I'm right.

Hawkgirl #50. Hawkman turns into Hawkgirl. So where's Hawkman? This weekend's panel in LA said that Hawkman is alive and well and on other titles. The decision and reason to switch the title to Hawkgirl is supposed to be revealed either in #50 or fairly soon after. It better be in this issue because I'm not sure how long it'll stay on my pull list. Hawkman has been a great book in the past and I don't see how a team of Simonson and Chaykin can go wrong. Parts of the premise intrigue me, but parts of it don't.  It seems that Hawkwoman will be centeralized in St. Roch and fighting demons there. I've always thought of the Hawks as more intergallatic and such, but that's just me and you've got a whole bunch of Green Lanterns for that any way.

JSA Classified #10. Vandal Savage returns. Thank god. I'm just going to try to expunge his last appearance from my mind. That horrible finishing arc in volume two of the Flash. Once again I love part of the premise -- Vandal Savage, the immortal cave man, is dying. But instead of really exploring that, it looks like he's returned to only take revenge against the Green Lantern (one can assume Alan Scott in this case although the cover art says otherwise.) I'd rather see a dying man reflect on his thousands of years and the futility of his attempts to take over the world than just go all revenge-plot on GL. Just seems like a snooze-fest.  Considering I have nearly a year of JSA issues collected that I haven't read yet, this better be kick ass or it joins that pile ....towards the back.

Manhunter #20. Haven't picked up any of the previous 19 issues and the premise of the OYL Manhunter hasn't been really even mentioned. It's one of DCU's lower books so there's no hype around it but fucking eh, Doctor Psycho is on the cover so I must get it. Then again Wolverine is on every damn Marvel cover whether he's in the book or not so DP might not be in it, but there's a good chance he is. And the JSA appear in next month's issue and Dr. Mid-Nite is on the cover so this is a series I'm going to be picking up for at least two months. The cover to #23 is not yet released -- either it's not finished or it reveals a plot point, so my interest is there.

Robin #148. Tempted not to pick this up. I slumped through the end of Wilingham's run.  Yes, Wilingham had to put up with bad artists through out his run but honestly, at the end of it I had to ask -- what was the point? What did he accomplish on Robin? Almost standard fare. I just kept picki ng the book up out of habit. Been doing it for so long I don't know how to drop it. The New Rising Sun Archer and the new Warlock's Daughter are female villains that I hope we see again in Robin, but with the whole OYL mandate and a new team, they could easily been lost and forgotten in the shuffle. Parts of his last arc "Tears of a Clone" were fun but it was a bit uneven and contrived although the way Luthor respects Robin, and vice versa was interesting -- albeit better explored over on the Teen Titans Annual.

And we already know four pages of the book involve him fighting an unknown assailant, which is supposed to be Batgirl (mind control?) and it appears as though he's killed her. If it happens at the end of the book, then what happens before then? Seems like it would be all filler as we already know damn well that he's going to be framed for this murder, and have known for two months at least now. If it happens in the beginning, we at least hit the ground running. Something tells me Adam Beechan will be hitting the ground running.  And thank god we finally have an artist on Robin. A four year old could do better than some of the recent art teams.

Supergirl and the Legion of Super Heroes #16. Diamond says it comes out this week, DC's website had it coming out two weeks ago. So who knows how late it'll be. Hopefully it's this week. Supergirl is one of those titles I was excited for and the first three issues came out and then bam, it took forever (it seemed not sure in reality) for issue four to come out. It was an Ultimates-esque delay. And then issue #5 came out smack right after it. I picked up #4 but I failed to get #5 so not sure how the series ended but I kinda understand there's more than one Supergirl and some how one is now part of the Legion in the 31st century and the other is in the Bottle City of Kandor. And I wouldn't be surprised if there's one for our world too (see Superman last week to see who's defending Metropolis when Clark's without powers.) I'll probably pick up Supergirl #5 at the mall this week (they're usually three weeks behind the comic stores) but I'm sure there's still going to be questions. Big fan of Waid although I've never gotten into the Legion too much. But the little subtle hints Waid's been dropping for this new new new (how many times has Legion been relaunched and changed directions?) direction have got me salivating.  I have assumptions and guesses to his plans and I hope he blows them out of the water.

As for Marvel releases, as I've mentioned, I'm not a big fan of single issue Marvel. Just about everything they do is packaged to be collected so there's little point to buying single issues. One of the reasons I avoided House of M until now. But still there's two Marvel books that are so damn fucking good that I can't help but pony up for them every month -- and they're both now written by Brubaker. Captain America #16 and Daredevil #83 make up my Marvel haul this week. Started getting back into Cap with the last volume.  Even Chuck Austen couldn't ruin the book and I ended up picking up the entire volume run (albeit it didn't last long). At first I didn't understand why they canceled that volume and restarted with a fifth (??) volume and a new number one. Then I read the first four issues and Brubaker hit the ground running in such a way that I realized they had to start over with a new volume to do it. The series recieved Wizard's best book of 2005 award and they aren't kidding. Easily the best mainstream book out right now.

And he's doing the same thing with Daredevil. Daredevil I believe is hands down my favorite superhero this side of Superman and Jay Garrick. When Brian Michael Bendis and Alex Maleev said they were departing the book, I was crushed. I thought I was going to have to drop Daredevil because there wasn't going to be anyone who could possibly be able to match what they did in the book.  Then they announced (a few months later) that Brubaker would be taking over my hope rose a bit but even Brubaker I didn't think could top what Bendis had done, nor what Bendis had ended with.  All it took was one issue. One issue of Brubaker's and my jaw dropped with what he accomplished. The wild fun ride continues. And you killed off Foggy Damnit. Fuck. Human supporting characters tend to stay dead! OMG! It came completely out of left field and you're already feeling for Matt Murdock (if you haven't been feeling for him since the beginning of Daredevil, what's wrong with you) when BAM, he kills Foggy.  Brubaker needed to do something to top Bendis and he knew it. He did it. And he did it with a purpose and he didn't do it cheaply.  It saddened you. It pissed you off. It wrenched your gut. But you weren't mad at Brubaker...you were angry at the Kingpin. And it felt great.  For the first time in a damn while, the Kingpin reasserted himself as a threat from anyway and showed why he's damn fucking evil and you don't want to mess with him EVER. Been waiting for this ultimate moment of villainry to return for some time now and finally it's back.

May pick up Wolverine #40. It's been a while since I've picked up Wolvy and with the entire fall-out from House of M, it's maybe time to see what the status quo over there is. As much as I despise the character and fan's reaction to him, there's no doubting that Wolverine is an amazing character to look in depth at. It's been a while since Larry Hama and even Frank Tieri (although not THAT long) since I've enjoyed Wolverine so I'm hoping they can hook me again.

 

 

Man, what's a guy gotta do to get a comment around this place?  Usually lists are a gold mine for comments and meh, no one cared again. Probably reminds me why I left tblog the first time.

 Doesn't help that right now I really have no idea what to write about. So today it's going to be random musings

NCAA BRACKETS

So how's your NCAA bracket? Maybe this is what its like to be older, but there was a time where I could watch a bajillion sports games and be well versed in every single player and team. Even at the college level. I didn't need any 'expert' help to fill out my brackets, damnit. Maybe I was just on a hot streak but back in HS I could usually call it fairly well. Of course Stanford (twice) and Wisconsin fucked me over losing in the first rounds the respective years I selected them.

This year ESPN says at most I can get 42% of the possible points. That's if I don't miss any more picks. Yeah, right. And in past years I would be devestated but honestly I had no hype, no drive, no motivation this year. I think a couple factors leading in just demolished any such forward desire for this year.

(1) Last season was so magical. Yes, I only hit a sultry 52% of possible points but Kansas lost opening to Bucknell (and yes, I'm happy Kansas nose dived to Bradley; FUCK BILL SELF) and the Illini made to the finals after such an amazing season that held my interest from the tip off of the first game to the heart-wrenching loss to those bastard UNC man-children. That final game will rank, always, as one of my favorite sports moments. One of the first real good sports moments I could enjoy at the legal drinking age and with friends and a dozen strangers I didn't know but was united with.  The 2005-06 Illini basketball season was like coming down from a fucking good snort of blow. The feeling losing to Washington in the round of 32 was just the exact same kind of crash, but the entire season was just one big 'come down' and it'll be years before anything can match the high of the 2004-2005 college basketball year for me.

(2) The tornadoes that ripped through Springfield left the town without power (and inter-net) until Tuesday night (for my area of town, some areas are still without power even now) I was at work when the brackets came out and by the time I got home the power was about to go out. Monday was a hectic day of clean-up and picking the town back on its feet that I didn't get to see the brackets until late that night for the first time. Even then I didn't really get to sit down with the brackets until Wendesday night around 11pm. And when I struggled to remember what college basketball I had watched, I could only say a handful of games and most of those just partial games.

Without TV or time to sit and read the newspaper I sort of just skipped all the media hype to the Big Dance. Usually even then just looking at a bracket use to get my blood to boil.  Not getting a chance to look at the bracket, I cut that hype out too.

(3) I just don't get a chance to watch enough games. Last year I got in a lot of Illini games because they were doing so well. This year between work, a large school workload, my own personal aspirations and an aggitated girlfriend, fitting in sports is hard. The lack of NHL last year also helped me free some time, but man this past year it's been hard to fit in sports now that the girlfriend is living with me. Only games I can catch are on my break at work or when she's not here, when I'd rather be doing other stuff or having to do homework -- so it's done when she gets home so she doesn't pout. It's quite a headache. 

In High school, homework I could get done in class or in like five minutes or if I didn't do it at all, it didn't hurt me all that much as its percentage wasn't worth shit. I didn't have a steady girlfriend for extended periods of time and none of them ever lived with me. I worked maybe 20 hours a week, if that. I had all the time in the world to do whatever the fuck I wanted.  Watch sports? Sure. Play games? Sure. Go out? Sure. See a movie? Sure. Write fiction? Sure. Now it's nada for all those. Work, school, and her take up about 120% of my time and it utterly blows. I don't have time to get hyped for 'some silly little tourney.'

And for the record I had only eight of the Sweet Sixteen and my Final Four was Duke, UCLA, Boston College, and MSU. Ouch. In the late 90s, I would be fucking better than that.

WORLD BASEBALL CLASSIC

The theme from above continues. I haven't seen a single game, then again I'm not sure I would have anyways. WBC was one of the dumbest ideas ever created. There's just no good time to play the damn thing so why bother?

But USA continues to suck in international team sports in 2006, continuing the trend set with the Olympic hockey showing (I did get to watch two games of them but was so disgusted I had to turn one of them off.) But all I ever heard leading up to the WBC was how much the Dominican Republic was going to run away with this thing. I picked the USA so egg on me, but Cuba and Japan sit in the finals. Dominican Republic may have MLB stars but once again, Cuba's the best baseball nation hands down.  Makes you a little scared of Kendray Molaras coming up for the Angels, if he's supposed to be the best player they've ever produced or whatnot. 

Though people are bitching this is a game without stars.  Yeah, because few people in the United States pay attention to Cuban and Japanese league baseball. No shit you think it's a game void of stars and name power beyond Ichiro. But Cuba plays with heart and not just heart, but all of it. I only wish I had the chance to watch tonight's final and the other Cuban games. The team sounds like a blast to watch; baseball the way it's meant to be.

Speaking of the Final it's being played in San Diego -- at Petco Park. Yeah, this gives me the segue to bitch about something that's been bothering me for a while now about my second favorite baseball club. You play in a stadium named after a dog/pet care center....Petco Park. Just say it with me -- Petco Park. How the fuck do you take yourselves seriously? Yes, you need that advertising money but you can't tell me there wasn't at least one other offer out there.

"Well, Kev, we didn't quite get the myriad of offers we were hoping for but we did get one offer and it's a doozy."

Is anything beneath coporate owned MLB? Wait. Don't answer that. But I really can't believe a stadium name could make me cringe worse than Minute Maid Park. I wonder how much Petco had to pay for naming rights. It better have been more than selling your soul to the fucking devil to make sense.

Other bad stadium names, any one got some from around the minors of any sports? It's hard to beat Petco Park, Minute Maid Park, Gaylord Entertainment Center, St. Pete-Times Forum, HP Pavillion, well you get the point.

This was going to be a post last week but because of those darn tornadoes and being without power, other things came first. It's odd, VH-1 keeps putting out these damn countdowns or retrospecs and I keep watching.  I'm addicted to the I Love the 80s and I Love the 90s and I Love colostamy bags....whatever VH-1 counts down, I'm there. Honestly without these shows, where else would we see all our favorite washed up celebrities -- other than the Surreal Life? Where else would anyone know Michael Ian Black's name?

Recently they produced I Love Toys -- the 100 greatest toys ever created. For the most part you've got to agree with them, there's a few toys on the list where you just drop your jaw and ask how it could be so low but then you start looking at the toys that came after it and you really can't move it all that much for where it is. They did a damn good job of it IMO. Most lists done on TV, it's obvious who number one is going to be -- I think they may have stretched to give a surprise number one in this case though -- and there's just a little bit to a lot of contraversy sprinkled in.  Fucking Hula-Hoop number one though? That's really my only beef but first, let's look at my top ten

1. Barbie

Yes, I'm a guy. Never owned a Barbie but I tortured my fair share of Barbies during my childhood. Let's face it, Barbie has helped shape the life-style obession that dominates today's landscape.  Yeah, I'm probably stretching a little bit but c'mon, would the whole 'nip/tuck' culture be as strong without Baribe telling young girls they aren't pretty enough? Every plastic surgeon owes their mutli-million dollar mansion to Barbie -- too bad she already has her Malibu Mansion. We use the word 'Barbie' in a connotation seperate from refering to the toy, that's quite a social accomplishment.

You can also use Barbie as a social barometer on how we feel about women's roles, marriage, divorce, and other things. I'm actually surprised, though maybe I just haven't seen it yet and it does exist, there isn't a lesbian companion for Barbie yet. Yes, that's not good, strong American morals but hell, neither was divorce at one point when she casted aside Ken.

She's also had more jobs than anyone not named Homer Simpson. Though I'm sure it's just to sell more dolls, it can be twisted into making girls believe they can be anything from a McDonald's Drive-Thru operator to a stay-at-home-where's-my-d inner mom to a sleazy Malibu slut to a doctor. The whole entire fucking gambit.  All while making ugly girls feel worse about themselves. That's just awesome

2. Legos

If you need to know why Legos are number 2 then get the fuck out. Probably should be number one but I think Barbie's done more. But I'd like to see the kid that didn't play with legos -- and most of Central Africa's children don't count in this survay. Legos are so awesome they have their own themepark for Christ sake. And they promote more creativity than any other toy. Too bad unless you were really really good, you needed the friggin kits to make anything that truly resembled what it was supposed to be.

Lego people are getting real diverse now. And they now have Lego-Pirate Ships and Lego-Pirates. And Pirates rule.

3. Bikes

Personally I never really used my bike all that much. I was never a good rider and meh, most of the kids in my town during first grade were lamers.  Of course I could blame all of this on why I was such a social outcast and lamer during high school but I'd rather blame it on the acne, the long hair and the comic books.

But man, just goes to show, Bikes were not only transportation and your first real freedom to roam around (and responsibility) but a status symbol until we were old enough to drive. It's a toy but more than a toy. And plus, without bikes, we probably wouldn't have the uber-cool motorcycles.

4. Wiffleball & Bat

Any toy you can play with from the ages of 5 until you croak and not look like a complete loser is friggin cool. Wiffleball leveled the playing field for those of us with little atheletic talent and it was fun as hell. Plus you could play anywhere, you really didn't need a baseball field with nothing around that you could break. Even Stickball didn't offer that. And you could do it with your family at large family outings.  Some of the only times I've ever gotten along with my entire family is playing Wiffleball. The only other times is probably at major funerals so Wiffleball is definitely a plus in the fact that no one has to die for bonding to occur.

5. Nintendo

This is one of the major travesties of the countdown. VH1 placed it at 21st and Atari at 20th.  Yes, I understand my history and we own a great deal to Atari but I think we owe more to Nintendo than we do to Atari.  Nintendo single handedly saved the video game market.  Without Super Mario Brothers there's no telling what would have happened to video games and without video games, there's no telling what would have happened to technology today. Would the inter-net have happened? Video and Voice chats? cellular phones?

Yeah, they'd probably would have happened either way but I doubt they would be exactly where they are today if not for the video game market.  My sole interest in technology growing up was to create video games -- I'm sure there were a lot of kids like me that branched off and did other things. Inter-net may have been made to become this big source of information but would it have grown as fast as it did if people weren't so lonely playing games by themselves? Would voice chat be where it is today if people didn't desire to trash talk when they smoked some poor sucker's ass in Unreal.

Yes, I can probably blame Nintendo and video games on my total lack of desire to ever go outside expect for one I absolutely have to or when forced out. And I'm sure that's the cause of a lot of my medical conditions and why I'm so fucking out of shape now that I'm no longer forced to run in gym classes.  Also probably to blame for my anti-social nature. But we'll overlook that.

If it weren't for games like Final Fantasy IV and VI and Secret of Mana and Crystalis and Legend of Zelda and Dragon Quest and ect, my flame and passion for story-telling and writing and Literature probably wouldn't have been stroked as much. So I guess some good came from it as I'm interested now in writing and I can easily point to Cecil, Kain, Gilbert, Edge, Tellah, Golbez and crew as the major reason why.

6. GI JOE

Actually pains me to put them this low. I had about 300 fucking GI Joes growing up. All the playsets and vehicles. It was bad fucking ass. Of course my GI Joes were the dinky ones because of the Star Wars figures but the big ones, when they started to come back were uber-cool too.

GI Joe -- the only time the friggin Miltary sounded cool to me. Combine Nintendo with GI Joe and you had that really decent side-scroller game that I begged and begged my mom for and she was cool enough to let me have it three weeks before my birthday. Can't remember if I ever beat it.

Then when you started to grow out of GI Joes, they became fun targets for fires and M-80s or strapping to model rockets or just rocket engines. I did what Cobra could never fucking do. Though let's face it -- GI Joe was ahead of its time fighting terrorism abroad. Cobra Commander was the first terrorist I was ever familar with and he wears a cooler mask than V does.

Also cool is the fact that GI Joe was an idea spun from the mind of one of my favorite comic writers, Larry Hama, responsible for one of the coolest runs ever on Wolverine. But GI Joe was intended to be Marvel Comics' SHIELD, led by Nick Fury, against Hydra. When Marvel brass turned down the idea, Hama just took it to Hasbro and allowed him to incorporate the idea around the GI Joe action figures.  Most of the characters in the series are actually Hama creations -- including COBRA.

7. NERF Products

Before there was paintball, there was a cleaner and cool alternative called NERF. Yeah you could knock over a lamp or two with the NERF toys but other than that, it was clean and barely hurt.  They even made sports balls of NERF revolutionizing the idea of playground sports forever. NERF guns and footballs ruled. Nuff Said.

8. Monopoly

An amazing board game, just too bad they never designed it to actually be finished. I've seen games last like eight hours.  That's an entire shift at work -- where I could be making REAL money. But it's a great stragety game and you can't find a household that doesn't own a board. You might not still have all the money and hotel pieces but you've got a board of some sort.

And there's not just the original board, there's Monolopy for everything --Justice League of America, Spongebob, Chicago, St Louis, New York, NHL, skin diseases ($130 for bed sores?!), and everything in between. IT's rediculous.

But where did we all learn our cut throat coporate attitudes? Fucking Monolopy baby. There'd be no Bill Gates or Donald Trump without this game. I bet they played it every night growing up. Monolopy is so ingrained into our culture. Mr. Moneybags, who the hell doesn't know what he looks like.  All Jim Carrey needs to do is say the words "You're the Monolopy Guy" and people know exactly what he's talking about. And everyone has their favorite piece and their favorite 'battle for that piece' story, where they broke Aunt Martha's leg and Papa Gigi's eye socket to claim ownership over the fucking car.

9. Yo-Yo

Originally number 8 on the VH-1 countdown I was tempted to leave it off my list. Probably because I could never do a single fucking trick with those things but here's why it makes the list: any time it goes out of fashion or style, it will always come back. Yes, all toys have 'cycles' but you can almost set your watch (er calender) by the Yo-Yo fad. 

When you see someone damn good at it, Yo-Yo's are the coolest thing in the world. Nothing shows that better than the episode of the Simpsons where that Yo-Yo-er comes to Springfield Elementry and everyone gets addicted to Yo-Yo's. I don't remember what else happens in the episode but you know the one I'm talking about -- it's the Simpsons. And true, in the hands of a master Yo-Yo's are cool.  Kinda like juggling. But when you try to juggle and fail miserablely, it ain't cool.  When you suck at Yo-Yo's then it just looks ugly. Ugly and hard to untie. And sometimes you can hit yourself in the back of the head with it. Not going to mention names.

Cue up the next Yo-Yo fad phase.

10. Play-Doh

I was honestly pissed when this came in at number 11 then here I am putting it at number 10. This is what I'm talking about with this list. You think things should be higher but when you really start looking at it, nope, they shouldn't

I never made anything interesting with it but the Barber shop alone is worth a top 10 entry. And the taste...well VH-1's rejects covered the taste pretty much to a tee. So yeah if you want to know all about that, just watch their shit.

 And there you are, my top 10 toys, three toys from VH-1's top ten are shoved outside and here's why.

VH-1's #1 Hula-Hoop

This wouldn't even make my 100. I was tempted to put jump rope in the top 10 but it's just not as cool as Play-Doh. It probably comes in around 11-15. While Jump Rope was done everywhere and all over the playground, honestly did any one 'hula-hoop' on the playground? Hell no. It was boring to watch and boring to do. Unlike Jump Rope. Plus hooping didn't take a shit load of skill, just move your hips. Only place anyone hula-hooped was in gym classes in middle school. That's it. How the fuck is that the number one toy of all time?

VH-1's #5 Mr Potato Head

He deserves a high mention and there's nothing wrong with him being in the top 10 because of his cultural power and the uber-coolness of him in Toy Story. But as a toy, he didn't do much in the way of entertainment value. Everyone has had one or more at one time or another though.

VH-1's #7 Star Wars Action Figures

Yeah, they schooled the original GI Joe and shrunk Action Figures for a couple generations but meh, they're Star Wars and I'm just a bit sick of Star Wars so maybe that's affecting my judgement. Yeah Lucas deserves credit for the ingenious idea of making them smaller -- because usually 'bigger' goes with 'better. He went against the grain. The original figures are worth a fuck load of money...yeah. But only to greasy fat guys who geek out over Bobba Fett. Yeah, the comics and the prequels made him cool but just from the original movies? I still don't see the obession with the fucking tin can. No one thinks the Metal Men are cool. Then again they don't have guns. Fuck. Ok, well the Fett-man is cool there's no way around it but Luke with the light sabre built into the arm -- that was lame shit.

VH-1's #9 Slinky

Originally when this started I thought it'd be top five, potentially top one. Slinkly rules -- as long as it's metal. Plastic ones sucked. Slinky's are cool for like science showing sine waves and all that garbage but when their main value to go down stairs what the hell is the point of that? And when they couldn't even go down stairs correctly even a quarter of the time, that's pathetic. Stubby Clapp's batting average is higher than my Slinky's success rate on stairs. When you fail at your main task that badly, how can you be a top ten toy?

 

 

As some of you may know, I make my residence in Springfield, Illinois -- and on Sunday we got rocked by not one, but two powerful tornadoes right down the middle of the city.

 More on the events of Sunday later as we just got our power back of for the first time since 8pm on Sunday night. Just wanted to confrim I'm still alive and around.

So much for comments on the trade deadline article. Had over 100 hits on it but no one said a thing. So either everyone agrees with every word I said or no one cares. Oh well, moving on.

First thing. I'm trying to forge the concept of a European Union sponsered super-team for my super-hero universe. Think Avengers/Ultimates but well Europe. Of course I assume not ALL the countries of the EU would have a state-sponsered super-hero and I've eliminated some of the nations because of it for a plot point. Other nations, I already have characters in mind -- some I've already had fleshed out for a while, others are just vague outlines right now. So what am I asking for? I'm well versed in your basic mythologies but is there some sort of small folklore character from your nation that I could potential draw upon? Like a broad and obvious example -- if Norway WERE part of the EU (and it's not for those who don't know) their SH rep would probably have something to do with Odin or Thor (although, yes Marvel has the Thor market covered -- it's just an example.)

Another example is the folk legend of the New Jersey Devil. It's obvious, to a degree, and the NHL team of New Jersey sports the name of the legend. Tweaking the legend a slight bit, I've developed a character from the legend. I want to hear some of your country (hopefully I reach someone in Europe on here, not sure) most unsual and unique folk legends. Tell me a story.

Second piece of business. As some of you know, the WB er CW network is currently filming a pilot episode for a TV series based around the character of Aquaman. It's from the producers of Smallville. Now I know what you're saying -- Aquaman? He's lame. Yes, in the hands of poor writers, any super-hero can be lame. In the hands of good writers, any super-hero can be the coolest on the planet. See Grant Morrison's run on Animal Man or what Geoff Johns did for the Rogue Gallary of the Flash. And let's face it, whatever you think about the genre -- Smallville is a damn well written show. Sometimes, like the entirity of season four, the episodes might not seem like much but when disected or viewed as a whole, they really are well written. And honestly, all of season five has been firing on all cylinders -- except for, ironically enough Aqua -- the episode that featured Aquaman. Combined with Tomb, that's only two bad episodes out of 15, which is A+ for a television series today.

I'm a bit wary. A couple months ago, just before it was announced they wanted to go ahead with an Aquaman television series, I plotted out over a few lunch sessions with a couple friends on campus four-plus seasons of an Aquaman show the way I wanted to see it work. Sadly, with little writing credit to my name there's no way WB would ever see my pitch. And even if they did, the pilot episode alone would cost more than the entire production run of the other 21 episodes in season one. Plus, I also had several characters that would appear for stretches and then dissapear from the plot, only to show up later a season, a season and a half later. It was very much a one-man show focused solely around Orin and his discovery of his roots and meeting his destiny head on, and it actually did deviate from the DCU version a bit to make it more interesting and easier to translate to TV for a more casual audience. A strong actor would have to be found to carry the role of Orin, and regretabbly there's really not that many young actors out there that would be able to pull it off. It's like asking a stage rookie to play Timon of Athens for his first performance ever.

Of course, Smallville was blessed with an incrediblely gifted actor in Tom Weilling, but even TW wasn't that good starting out. He's matured and evolved into quite an amazing TV actor before our eyes these past five years. Kudos to him. He's also had the help of an extordinary supporting cast -- Kristan Kreuk occasionally feels like she has so much more to go, but Allison Mack, Michael Rosenbaum, Sam Jones Jr., and now Erica Durance (you know she's growing on you) form a young cast you couldn't be more proud to have. Throw in a re-invented Johnathan Schneider, a lovely Anette O'Toole, and the simplely amazing John Glover and it's no wonder Weilling as grown as he has.

A strong cast is a must. While I had a peripheral cast, I often found myself having to increase roles and creating a parallel story line running through each season for Lorena (not Aquagirl III, but my love interest for Orin before Mera) just so she wouldn't dissapear for episodes at a time while Orin is off in like Alaska. But Mercy Reef, the CW version of Aquaman is doing what Smallville did -- trying to keep Orin er Arthur in one spot and surrounding by a supporting cast. Justin Hartley, of NBC's Passions soap opera will be taking over the role as AC and he'll be joined by Smallville alums Adrianne Palicki (who played proto-Kara Zor-El at the end of season 3) as Nadia, and Denise Quinones (who played Andrea Rojas in season five) as love interest Rachel Starling. Lou Diamond Phillips will star as coast guard Tom Curry -- AC's adoptive father, and Ving Rhames will be McCaffrey, a lighthouse keeper (although no one's 'kept' a lighthouse since about 1991, a plot point that drastically changed my Tom Curry in my first season) who's actually an exile of Atlantis who's keeping an eye on AC mentoring him. It's a fairly strong cast -- although more players will be added if the pilot is successful.

But here's my worries for Mercy Reef.

1. AC will work/own a Swim-shop. Ugh. Can you see the drama there?

OH NO! WE'RE OUT OF SWIM FINS!!!! Oh, wait -- there's the UPS guy! HOORAY!

Let's face it. This could get very gimmicky. With a former Miss Universe (as Quinones is) and a lovely blonde (as Palacki is) and whatever other love interests they add to a series set on a beach and filmed in Miami, this could turn out being Baywatch with Super-powers. Not cool. After all, the guy who was originally casted as AC before Hartley was an underwear model named Will Toale. Though to Toale's credit he's currently starring as the ape (or man's man) Stanley in A Streetcar Named Desire on Broadway. At least to remedy this, they'll be augmenting his powers a tad. Supposedly splashes of water will increase his speed and strength allowing for more 'land-based' adventures.

2. The over-arching plot of season one will revolve around the Bermuda Triangle. Yippie, so when it fails in prime-time it'll at least have an audience on Sci-Fi. See Sliders, Stargate SG-1 and others. Though yes, I love those shows. Anyone wanting to buy me a little gift -- I could use SG-1 seasons 1 through 8 and Sliders 1+2 and 3 damnit. Yeah, it's good to have some sort of over-arching plot to hold the season together but it just seems like one that they could continue for a while, or just quickly wrap up and shove under the rug and change directions. Could be good. Could be bad. The lee-way for either direction scares me.

3. McCaffrey is going to be his mentor, along with Tom Curry. I guess the reasoning is, Batman has Alfred and Kal-El has Ma and Pa Kent, so we need mentors for AC.

Well that's bullshit. The one thing that sets Aquaman apart from Superman and Batman is the fact that he's really never had a mentor. True, Vulko (who I hope makes the show some time) acts as a mentor for Orin/AC and is responsible for his being alive in exile instead of dead as a baby, but Orin grows up without a lot guidance. The lightkeeper that raises him and gives him his name never seemed to play a huge role in anything. And after he passes away, Orin wanders around a bit if I remember correctly. Goes up north and fathers a kid (unknown to him) with an Inuit girl. He fathers another kid with Mera in Atlantis, but when the Black Manta (think Aquaman's Joker) offers him a choice -- chase him or save his infant son from death, Orin in rage goes after the villain and leaves his son to die.

He makes other mistakes in his life than that but that's the big one. Can't get much bigger than letting your own son die so you can beat up on a guy. One thing I felt my mini-treatment to the Aquaman TV series dwelled on and into was his lack of a mentor growing up. My version of Tom Curry raises him from an infant to 18 (when the series would start after the pilot) and I had killed off in episode 8-9 (before the first break for re-runs) so his influence was minimal. He would meet Superman around episode 13 (I had it as episode 13 but I felt it could be moved anywhere from 12 to 16) and we would contrast the two men -- one who has had mentorship and one all alone in the world. I feel it makes the character at least somewhat different.

Yeah, Superman and Batman have made mistakes but nothing as bad as Koryak or Artie Jr. And definitely not as bad as letting the sharks (supposedly) kill Black Manta as we saw in Aquaman #39 a month ago. I think we take a bit of it away giving him so much of a foundation to rely on, making it too much like Smallville. Which isn't bad, just prehaps not as amazing as it could be. Sure, the approach is much more pratically but maybe not as interesting.

But as they say, can't judge until we see (if we see) the trailer -- which is currently filming. So let's pray for the best.

Ah the NHL trade deadline. There's no better day in sports. So much always happens at a blinding pace that it's hard to digest anything. Best deadline day in sports bar none. MLB deadline? Not really a deadline. NBA deadline? A bunch of convaluted and complicated trades are worked out that really affect nothing. NFL deadline? Most fans don't know they have one and it usually only invovles a guard or a couple potential back-up QBs at best. Nope, the NHL deadline is usually home to like a bajillion (or little closer to a dozen) moves each year. Most figured the new salary cap, this being the first year under it, would reduce the number of NHL trades to a trickle instead of the usual tempest.  Appearently not so, although it wasn't quite a tempest this year and the market's biggest players were taken off the market during the day -- namely Finnish star Olli Jokinen.  Man, remember we people were quick to label Jokinen a bust in LA and New York? Now you had about 20 teams after the former third overall pick.

Shall we break down the day?

ANAHEIM MIGHTY DUCKS

The Ducks started early -- March 1st to be exact when they sent LW Joel Stepp to Atlanta for G Jani Hurme. Most people saw this as a precursor to JS Giguere being dealt allowing Russian rookie Ilya Bryzgalov to take over in net. Sorry folks but Giguere is still the netminder in Anaheim and is playing decent at the moment. Why was this trade done then? Let's face it, Hurme hasn't played much in the past three years with various injuries and a failed physical, but he's a better insurance policy to Giguere and Bryzgalov, both excellent starters, than Michael Wall or Nathan Maesters. Stepp goes to the ECHL for Atlanta and with their depth on the left side, not sure we'll be seeing Stepp in the NHL anytime soon, if ever.

The Ducks also got into the defensemen swapmeet that defined the day, dealing NHLers Keith Carney, Sandis Ozolonish and AHLer Juha Alen. Carney and Alen went north to help the injury-riddled Canucks and Ozo found his way off Burke's payroll and to the Rangers.  From the Cancuks Burke grabbed a second round selection and defenseman Brett Skinner who will join the Ducks major roster.  There's no question that Burke, who helped build this Canucks team, knows their prospect list and Skinner was a kid he was adament about grabbing. When you add a kid like this AND a second round selection for what amounts to a playoff rental that Burke wasn't going to sign, i think you've got to hand it to the man.

However the Ozolinsh trade is a bit puzzling. The Ducks are only three points out of the playoff picture (albeit behind Vancouver whom they just helped short term with Carney) and got nothing in return for their main offensive weapon on the blue line.  It frees up $2.75 million for next season but that's just it -- they had Ozolinsh signed for next year. But then again it's not like he's played that much for the Ducks this year -- 17 games due to personal problems and substance abuse program which he's finally out of it appears.

Ducks did send C Joel Perrault to Phoenix for D Sean O'Donnell to help combat Ozolinsh's loss and O'Donnell is one of my favorite 4/5 dmen in the league. Having a + rating in Phoenix is rough to do and he's got one more year left on the contract so he figures into the Duck plans for 06-07. Perrault really has only a small hope at the NHL but the 'new rules' just might allow him a chance. Still basically O'Donnell for nothing.

The final acquisition for the Ducks was LW Jeff Friesen, in a return to the pond. Guy hasn't really been all that great since his days in Anaheim and San Jose and this year in Washington has been painful to watch. Injuries and just piss-poor play have killed him. Lucky for him Anaheim is fairly thin on the left side of the ice. Though how he's worth a second round pick is beyond me and the most puzzling thing of this deadline. 7 points in 33 games?

Bottom line, Burke's moves are a tad confusing at best. Only three points out of the playoff spot they looked like they were serious about a run when grabbing O'Donnell but then dealt Carney to the team ahead of them for good future return and dealt Ozolinsh away for practically nothing. Then they overpaid for what has to be the worst playoff rental ever. I think you can put a fork in the Ducks for now but at least this signals that Ruslan Salei will be patroling their blueline in 06-07.

ATLANTA THRASHERS

This was a team I thought would try and do more although I'm not exactly sure what. They do address their need for a puck moving dman by ponying a seventh-rounder in 2007 (a conditional one at that) for Vancouver's Steve McCarthy. McCarthy is on pace to career-highs across the board -- 70 games played, 3 goals, 5 assists, 8 points and 59 PIMs with a +3. Once a highly touted kid (thought for a while to be 1999's top pick) poor decision making has really killed him. He'll split time with Shane Hnidy as Atlanta's sixth dman.

They also lost C Rico Fata on waivers although no one's crying about that. Bottom line, 9th in the conference and they added a kid that will struggle to hold down the 6 spot on the blueline and is pretty much, at 25, a bust.

BOSTON BRUINS

 Bruins fans wake up every morning and want to kill themselves. Ugh. I'm sick of Boston whining. You had Orr. Were all the NBA championships not enough?  Do you forget the Patroits are essentially your team. You won your World Series finally. Shut up now. Mike O'Connell isn't a genius but fuck sake's how many GMs are? Learn one thing about sports -- there are only a small handful of people that actually KNOW what they are doing in that seat. After them there is a huge middling of people that are just guessing. Mike O'Connell is in that middling. Your team wouldn't be better off switching GMs unless you're scoring one of those upper guys. And can you pry them away from their teams? No. So shut up, the rest of the world is tired of your constant bitching.

LW Sergei Samsonov was NOT going to re-sign in Boston. Yes, the trading of C Joe Thornton was odd at best but hmm, I distinctively remember Boston fans doing nothing but bitching about Big Bird in the playoffs. Ugh. And let's face it, the return for Samsonov isn't that horrible although it's not great. C Marty Reasoner is capable of winning face-offs and playing a checking role. He's on pace to top his career high in goals albeit by one. He's at least going to play on the Bruins and give them a nice body.  Yan Stansty returns to the Bruins in the confusing saga of LW Brad Isbister, who I'd like to say I-told-you-so with him being a bust again this year. And at least the second round pick will be fairly decent in the second round. Sitting in 12th in the conference, you weren't going to be making moves to try and manuever into the top 8 so shut up Boston.

To off-set Samsonov's loss the Bruins claimed RW Mariusz Czerkawski off waivers from division rival Toronto. Though with 5 points in only 19 games due to shoulder injuries, healthy scratches and an illness. It's his second trip to Beantown but it'll be a question of which stint was worse when it's all said and done.

 BUFFALO SABRES

Additions none. But sitting fourth in the conference if it ain't broke, don't fix it. They did however finally solve their goalie problem.  Martin Biron and Ryan Miller you both can relax because you're staying in the snowiest place in the US. G Mika Noronen heads to Vancouver to help.  Anyone thinking Buffalo was going to get high return for any of their goalies was stupid but a second round pick (and what will most likely be a mid-second at that) was a damn good pick. Still it might not have been the best choice, Noronen is cheap while keeping two number one goalies still creates nothing but problems. Heaven forbide Michael Valent comes over from Europe next season and turns into yet another top flight goalie spec -- though I'm not holding my breath.

CALGARY FLAMES

Reaquiring Cale Hulse at the end of Feburary was good, but I'm a Hulse fan and he was only picked up to provide depth while Roman Hamrlik is on the IR. Joining Hamrlik for a couple weeks will be Rhett Warrener so the Hulse pick-up was done at the right time. Really wouldn't want to be relying on names like Komarniski and Marr down the stretch.

GM Darryl Sutter also acquired Jamie Lundmark from the Coyotes. To make room for Lundmark he sent C Jason Wiemer to the New Jersey Devils for a third round selection. Wiemer, I like, but he's been a healthy scratch a majority of the year and the Flames need a bit more scoring. But will Lundmark add that? Lofty expectations in the Big Apple have essentially killed this kid's career. He's from Alberta and it just might work but I'm not holding my breath. But seeing as they give up a fourth round selection, this is essentially Wiemer for Lundmark and I think it's worth the 'risk.'

CAROLINA HURRICANES

91 points and they're still tinkering -- mostly because of RW Erik Cole's recent injury that landed Brooks Orpik on the suspension list. Cole's probably out all of the playoffs you'd think but even with the final games of the season being a wash, he set career highs in goals, assists, points, short-handed goals, game-winners and +/-. So to say he was a 'cog' of this sucess is an understatement as he's finally reaching his potential.  Carolina's big move came towards the first of the year when they picked up C Doug Weight although Weight hasn't been quite the pick-up they'd hoped for.

To off-set Cole's loss the Hurricanes appealed to RW Mark Reechi to lift his no-trade clause from Pittsburgh.  He did and forwards Niklas Nordgren and Krys Kolanos land in Pittsburgh along with a 2007 second-rounder. It's basically Reechi, on pace for about 74 points, for free. And not just 74 points but playoff expierence, something the Canes really need at this moment, for free.

Why free? I don' see the Canes just fading to the end of the pack again like they did in 2003. I see that pick being a very late second rounder. Nordgren I was high on when drafted in 1997 but the potential two-way player hasn't added enough offense to make him anything more than an average checker. Kolanos was bounced around a lot this year and for a goal scorer, just doesn't score enough goals. He's got big time goal scoring potential and great size but if you're looking for anything else out of him, you're trying to find Waldo in Moby Dick. Doesn't seem to grasp any other concept and concussion problems have completely killed his confidence. He'll play in Pittsburgh but if he fails the audition left in the season, then expect the 24 year old to be out of the NHL for good.

Bottom line on Reechi -- he'll help them towards the Cup this year, but like fellow Cane playoff rental Weight, Reechi's talking about returning to Pittsburgh as a FA next year, perhaps his last. His family is in Pittsburgh (hence the no-trade clause) and if Carolina were any farther from Pittsburgh, I'm positive he wouldn't have waived it. Pittsburgh could perhaps have the last laugh here depending on the second round pick and Reechi's plans. Though keeping the Cup in the Southeast Division would be quite a laugh for the Canes.

CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS

So much for the hope. This season started off so strong for the Hawks but looks like the celler is where they lay again. Team sold what they could and what wasn't in their plans anymore. Adrian Aucoin and Nik Khabibulin would have been gone too if it weren't for their salaries and Aucoin's injury.

Still they lost C Andy Hilbert to Pittsburgh on waivers (boo hoo), sent veterans D Todd Simpson and C Jim Dowd to Montreal and Colorado respectively and pain-in-the-ass C Tyler Arnason to Ottawa.

The returns for Simpson and Dowd were always going to be minimal. A sixth round and a fourth round pick are nothing to sneeze at. Simpson's departure at least let's Yawney take a look at some of the younger kids like Byfuglien, Barinka and Wisniewski.

Arnason's return nabed one-time Calder Trophy favorite RW Brandon Bochenski and a second round selection. Bochenski had one hell of a preseason but that was with Spezza and Heatley. Though it's not like he doesn't have any talent on his own. He skated along side Hawks top players Kyle Calder and Mark Bell during the third period last night. No points but he'll be given every chance to succeed and show off his talents in Chicago. Though you've got to wonder how much longer on Bickell, Garlock, Berti, Sindel, Bolland, Blunden, Skille, Bertram and if those kids will even be answers in Chicago.

COLORADO

G Jose Theodore for G David Aebischer might be the most contraversial deal of the deadline. For one, Theodore's season in Montreal has been horrible while Aebischer has finally started to come on.  There's no doubt that Theodore is an improvement talent wise over Aebischer but wouldn't you want to play the hotter hand? Plus Theodore is out until maybe the playoffs so that forces the Avalanche to use rookie G Petr Budaj and Kazak G Vitaly Kolesnik, who hasn't quite adjusted to the NA game as I had hoped.

Worse part of the deal, the Aves lose $3 million in cap space next season. C Joe Sakic and D Rob Blake have said they will accept pay cuts to stay in Denver but LW Alex Tanguay and D John-Michael Liles are due raises. RW Marek Svatos was due one until he hurt his shoulder again.

GM Pierre Lacroix also added C Jim Dowd from Chicago for a fourth rounder. Dowd's a pen-killer and a right-handed face-off man, something the team desperately needed. Dan Hinote and Ian Lapapeirre leave a lot to be desired in the face-off category. Dowd's also played with several of the teammates he'll be joining in Colorado.

Still Lacroix can into this deadline looking to replace LW Steve Konowalchuk (out for the year) and then Svatos (also out for the year) on the second line and failed to replace either one. One has to wonder if Lacroix is trying to play magician by distracting Denver with the Theodore trade while doing nothing about the team's real holes.

COLUMBUS BLUE JACKETS

Sent D Luke Richardson to Toronto for a sixth round pick (in either 2006 or 2007). No biggie, Columbus brass had deminished Richardson's role so much that he handed in his captaincy. I'm hoping he told them to go shove it too.

The major trade for the Blue Jackets happened at the beginning of the year when they landed C Sergei Fedorov. As I predicted, it did nothing and they're fighting for the top pick again. Anyone foaming at the mouth of seeing LW Rick Nash and RW Nik Zherdov along side Fedorov has to be sorely dissapointed but also an idiot.

GM Doug MacLean, please hang it up. You're part of the middling of GMs (see Boston) and towards the bottom. When you traded D Cale Hulse to Calgary for LW Cam Severson you made the comment that Severson served to add grit and size to the NHL line-up. Yeah Severson looks so nice in Syracuse. Since when was Severson an NHL regular? No wonder why this organization looks utterly pathetic.

DALLAS STARS

They've been making small additions throughout the season -- LW Niklas Hagman, D Janne Niinimma, LW Jeremy Stevenson. But D Willie Mitchell is prehaps their most solid yet.  The asking price on Mitchell, Minnesota's top dman, was said to be high, but winds up being Mitchell and a second rounder (2007) for Dmen Martin Skoula and Shawn Belle.

Mitchell, a 3/4, settles well into Dallas's second pairing and is a defensive dman needed for the playoffs. Skoula is a guy that seems to be living off potential but I don't think has shown THAT much potential. There's a reason he's been bounced around so much, but D Andrei Zyuzin was molded into a servicable NHL dman in Minnesota so there's hope for Skoula I guess. Belle is a former first rounder and an amazing athelete and the real prize of the trade.  Guess Dallas felt they could deal him -- after all they absolutely stole him from St Louis so they really had no business owning him.

DETROIT RED WINGS

When you're best in the west what do you need to do? They swapped D Jamie Rivers to Phoenix for a seventh rounder and then spent a fourth rounder on D Cory Cross from Pittsburgh.

People thought they moved Rivers to clear up cap space as a precusor to some huge deal. People are idiots. Yeah, moving Rivers's $450k allowed them to do so much. Pick up $874k of Cross? It's 'speculation' like that that makes me hate people. Cross is an improvement and a workhorse. He won't need to worry about heavy minutes or scoring in Detroit, just giving their older dmen a bit of relief. Pretty solid move if you ask me.

EDMONTON OILERS

Potentally the big winners of the deadline. LW Sergei Samsonov might be a playoff rental but it's a team desperate for a first line player. Marty Reasoner was expendable in adding C Rem Murray, who's trying to make a career come-back from forced retirement. Yan Stansty really didn't play himself into Edmonton's plans and sending him back to Boston was no biggie. The second round pick is the only real valuable asset Edmonton gave up, and they'll say it's worth it if the team can make the playoffs and make some noise. However, if the team is able to resign Samsonov, major coup for them. Most likely he'll wind up some where else to a team with tons of cap money to give him.

G Dwayne Roloson also heads to Edmonton as a potential rental but it looks like all the media and fan whining for a goalie got to GM Kevin Lowe as he coughed up the team's first round pick in 2006 and a conditional third round pick in 2006. If you're counting, yes the Oilers have given up a 1st, 2nd and 3rd in this year's draft at the deadline to acquire two rentals. Could be egg on face if they don't make it out of the first round. Lowe's definitely on the hotseat. Though to Edmonton relief -- that third rounder only goes to division rival Minnesota IF Edmonton resigns Roloson.

Rolo is one of those 'late-bloomers' so they say, I say he might just be a little bit of a fluke. I'm still not sold on him despite his improvement over Ty Conklin. Although I'm not exactly sure he's a real improvement over Jussi Markkanen. Honestly, this might wind up looking horrible for the Oilers.

They also lost G Mike Morrison to Ottawa on waviers.

FLORIDA PANTHERS

The fact that they were able to resign captain and soul Olli Jokinen and useful C Chris Gratton is all the team really needed. Still 13th place in the conference has to taste sour. However, the one trade Florida did pull off is quite sweet in exchanging former 9th overall C Petr Taticek for D Ric Jackman.

Let's not kid ourselves. It's worth a shot for the Penguins but Taticek is a bust. Though Jackman, despite probably being overrated by most people, really doesn't fit in with the Panthers. Sean Hill, Mike Van Ryn and Steve Montador already patrol the right side of the ice. And Jackman's offense isn't that impressive to move those guys. I assume Hill's out in the offseason somehow. But for right now, this deal is pretty much irrelevent.

 LOS ANGELES KINGS

Two trades for the current 7th seed. They send D Denis Grebeshkov, LW Jeff Tambellini (both former first rounders) and a conditional third-rounder for D Brent Sopel and RW Mark Parrish from the Islanders. It feels like overpayment but the Kings are loaded in specs so what's the harm in adding two pretty nice pieces. Sopel will aid their blue line as a nice 3/4 addition. Should also work well on the powerplay. Hopefully some of his mental blunders don't show up in LA. Parrish is on pace to top the 30 goal mark for the second time. Ability to play left or right wing makes him valuable.  Too bad he sometimes drifts in focus and defense is a foreign concept to him. Still along side RW Dustin Brown and C Eric Belanger, he gives the team a dangerous third line. If only the LW Val Bure gamble had paid off this year.

The Kings also sent C Yanick Lehoux BACK to Phoenix for RW Tim Jackman, acquired earlier in the year from Columbus. Jackman's a big body and big underacheiver. Pretty much a useless pick-up. Yotes love Lehoux (picked him off waivers from the Kings, but lost him again to the Kings when trying to send him to the minors) and I can't blame them but each day it looks less and less likely he'll be the player I thought he'd be coming out of the QMJHL.

MINNESOTA WILD

Ask GM Doug Risebrough how it feels to rape another man. A division rival man. A first round pick alone for G Dwayne Roloson, sent to Edmonton, is pure gold. Wild get a third round pick if the Oilers resign the slightly overrated Roloson. Feels good. G Emmanuel Fernandez should have always been the starter and its about time that he's realized it.  Sadly though, if Fernandez goes down there's not much depth. Josh Harding would then be the starter and Miro Kopriva, while full of potential, just isnt' ready. Expect the offseason to see the Wild add a solid back-up.

Though while I'm sure rape feels good, it looks like the team is packing it at the 11th seed. Their top Dman Willie Mitchell was dealt to Dallas along with a second round pick.  Coming into the deadline the asking price for Mitchell was said to be at least a first round pick. Guess they came down on that. They do get Martin Skoula and Shawn Belle. If Andrei Zyuzin can ressurect his career in Minnesota, it's not out of the question to assume Skoula can show something in the North. Still his positioning is horrid, his decision making is piss-poor, and his offense has never out-weighed any of that. Sadly he might just play in Minnesota by default. Belle's a true prize that honestly should never have been dealt this many times. Just chaulk it up to Blues GM Larry Pleau being a middling.

Before the deadline the Wild placed struggling C Alexandre Daigle on waivers to pick up RW Mattias Weinhandl. So much for Minnesota being the phoenix of Daigle's career. You have to wonder if its over now. A couple years ago I thought Weinhandl would be a servicable second line option....now at 25, looks like I was wrong. Let's hope that a Pouliot-Koivu-Gaborik line is in the works for next year.

MONTREAL CANADIENS

Currently sitting in 8th the Habs did what they needed to do. They severed ties with G Jose Theodore, ending an era. Theodore season hadn't been what was hoped for and the pressure of the media and fans in Montreal has been growing intense ever since the 'family situation' from a couple years ago. But with him out up until the playoffs, the Habs couldn't sit back and wait for him to return while just barely holding on to a spot and went to G David Aebischer, who will also save them nearly $3 million in cap room next year. He's starting to turn it back on and at the right time too. He'll probably split some time with G Cristobal Huet but I expect him to quickly win the job. Montreal can't wait for G Carey Price to be ready I assume. At least Aebischer gives them two or three years.

Canadiens also burned a sixth round pick for Chicago's D Todd Simpson, who gives them some desperately needed size and toughness. Too bad he's, at best, a 7th man though could factor into the playoffs.

NASHVILLE PREDATORS

Everyone came into the deadline expecting them to make some sort of splash. C Mike Sillinger from the Blues earlier was a pretty darn pick up but perhaps not enough for the Preds sitting in fourth in the West.

Their only move was to pick-up Washington captain D Brendan Witt, who's been rumoured out of Washington since well before the lock-out, but Nashville may just have paid too much in giving up a first round selection. I'd expect this means Witt will stay in Nashville as a second or third pairing guy seeing as he has a relationship with GM David Poile (who drafted him.) C Kris Beech, bordering on being a full bust, returns to Washington as a needless throw-in.

Still the Predators lose what in a first round pick? Most people see the time as now for this franchise. And while the Predators draft has weilded some solid players, nothing they've drafted has been a complete homerun, sorry but C David Legwand isn't going to be the franchise center we thought. Man he was considered 1B to C Vincent Lecavalier's 1A? Washington needs and is better off with that first rounder than Nashville.

NEW JERSEY DEVILS

Who would think the Devils would need more defense? Perhaps D Richard Matvichuk's back injury is worse than thought. But the Devils did add D Ken Klee (from Toronto) and D Brad Lukowich (from the Islanders). They also acquired C Jason Wiemer (from Calgary) and sent D Sean Brown (to Vancouver) and C Aleksander Suglobov (for Klee).

Klee should fill nicely on the Devils third pairing with either D David Hale or D Tommy Albelin. I've always liked Suglobov but did you see him making the Devils? Basically got Klee for nothing. Lukowich is another defensive stalwart, that plays a very smart, conservative game....which should endear him to GM/Coach Lou Lamoriello, one of those upper GMs. Has a nice point shot but not really a PP option and I'm still waiting for him to rip someone's head off. Still he'll fit nicely on the second pairing in place of Matvichuk.

With Klee and Lukowich on board, 7th dman Brown was expendable and a fourth round pick is amazing return for the guy, especially seeing as by the time the playoffs roll around and Vancouver's healthy again, Brown will be in Manitobia.

Weimer gives the Devils an addition and upgrade to their fourth line. He was expendable in Calgary, too many players just like him, but at least he'll be used in New Jersey. After stealing a fourth rounder for Brown, I guess blowing a third rounder on Weimer is alright. He'll play at any forward position, add grit, work well in Lou's system and definitely is a plus over the likes of C Erik Rasmussen, LW Darren Langdon and LW Jason Ryznar.

NEW YORK ISLANDERS

It's all about the future now, sitting in 11th out East. Islanders land two former first rounders from LA -- D Denis Grebeshkov and LW Jeff Tambellini. People point and say Grebeshkov has struggled, I point and say he's only 22. Maybe "The Year of the Rookie" has spoiled some idiots but 22 year olds, in reality, can be expected to struggle a tad bit. He's a damn smart kid, has offensive potential and can lay you out.  You can say a lot about his lack of size but isn't shouldn't be as bad in the NHL now. Might not be able to handle some power forwards down low but can certainly find his niche. Definitely slides into the Islanders third pairing already and gives them quite a complement of young dmen with Campli, Gervais, Caldwell, Marci, O'Neill coming.

Tambellini has already had four NHL games this year but has no points on six shots. Probably plays for the Islanders on their third line and has the potential to round into quite a fine player. The outlook is the future for the Islandersand that's why D Brad Lukowich and D Brent Sopel found their way out. Picked up in the offseason for a playoff run, they failed their jobs. Oddly enough, they failed to do their jobs in taking the Islanders to the playoffs and are rewarded by being tossed immediately into the playoff race. Man. RW Mark Parrish had been rumoured out of Long Island for a couple seasons now despite 2005-06 being potentially his career season.

Islanders also received a third round pick for my sleeper pick of this season, C Oleg Kvasha. If Kvasha couldn't do it this season then you can lable him a bust. Though I guess in Phoenix, where they love mammoth underachievers (see Mike Rupp) he'll fit in.

NEW YORK RANGERS

The team everyone loves to hate is actually going to perhaps win the Atlantic divison (although Philadelphia and New Jersey will have their say in that). Oddly enough they did one addition and one subtraction. Everyone's favorite aggitator LW Ville Nieminen was dealt to the San Jose Sharks for a third round pick. Most likely means they had no chance to resign him to a second season, though it also sets their left side up fairly nicely after a small log-jam for most of the year. Can't complain about a third rounder for an energy guy.

They also spend a third rounder to acquire Anahiem's D Sandis Ozolinsh, who's spent some time in the NHLPA's susbstance abuse program and will come in as the Rangers' sixth dman. Still he should add another dimension to their powerplay and they will have him signed for next season too. Could pay in spades or if not, oh well, they waste a third round pick and eat the salary. I think it's worth the risk.

OTTAWA SENATORS

Senators have been sqwaking for a while they needed a second line center. C Tyler Arnason, from Chicago, fits the bill and is on pace for a career high 38 assists and 56 points. Something tells me Ottawa will bump those numbers up even more and hopefully he can add another 20-goal season (on pace for 18). He's a decent two-way player but his consistency leaves a bit to be desired and maybe doesn't always play with his heart. No one really was sure how the brass in Chicago truly felt about him and some off-ice issues are a bit worisome. He'll play alongside LW Martin Havlat, when he returns from injury. If he can keep himself out of trouble and finds his consistency down the stretch, an amazing pick-up for the Senators

They do cough up a second round pick and RW Bradon Bochenski. Though neither asset being lost hurts the Senators, who definitely are in it for the now. Troubles resigning D Zdeno Chara and D Wade Redden in the offseason will be interesting. Best win your Cup now.

The team also added G Mike Morrison (Edmonton from waivers) to help back-up G Ray Emery while G Dominik Hasek recovers from injury. Certainly a step up from G Billy Thompson. They also managed to sign D/LW Brad Norton as a potential injury call-up during the playoffs. Guess Tomas Malec and Lance Ward weren't enough.

PHILADELPHIA FLYERS

What would a trade deadline day be without the Flyers making a deal? GM Bob Clarke made his obligated moves and you still have to wonder where all their cap room comes from. They picked up RW Niko Dimitrakos from San Jose for a third round pick. Dimitrakos has scored some big goals in his career. Just doesn't score enough goals to matter. Yet still an improvement over RW Turner Stevenson and is a bright kid and capable passer. Still he's small and worthless without the puck. Perhaps not what the Flyers needed but they've already made enough moves up front -- Forsberg, Nedved for example.

Clarke also made another upgrade to their blueline by picking up D Denis Gauthier from the Phoenix Coyotes for two second round picks (both in 2006) and C Josh Gratton. Gauthier is potentially UFA in the offseason so it could be a bit of a waste, but Clarke stock piles draft picks for this reason and he'll find a way to get more by the time the draft rolls around. Two picks are nothing. Gratton's a legit NHL heavyweight but the role of the enforcer is next to nothing now and RW Donald Brashear is blocking the way. I don't think losing Gratton hurts at all. Gauthier also takes off the pressure in case D Darrian Hatcher's knee isn't ready by the playoffs. Also factor in D Kim Johnsson's recent injury (and to a lesser extent D Chris Therien's injury) and the Flyers needed another dman if they wanted a run towards the Cup.

May I also point out, all those people that thought the Flyers could sit back and rely on C Mike Richards and C Jeff Carter, yeah decent production but not the amazing numbers people expected out of them.  Damn that Alexander Ovechkin and Sidney Crosby, now people think rookies shouldn't struggle and should produce at amazing clips throughout the course of an entire season. And that's just not true.

PHOENIX COYOTES

Best move the Coyotes could do is fire Wayne Gretzky as coach. Of course, him stepping down is the only way he's going out of there. And with Rick Tocchet in ddep shit, just put Rick Bowness back in charge. At least he knows what he's doing.

The Steven Reinpretch deal last month was supberb but the deadline in Phoenix saw basically jettisons all day long. G Phil Sauve was placed on waivers (though not picked up, so one must wonder where his career will go). The team sent RW Tim Jackman packing to LA, C Jamie Lundmark to Calgary, D Denis Gauthier to Philadelphia, and D Sean O'Donnell to Anaheim. All good moves. Jackman probably won't be much of an NHLer, Lundmark is bordering on a bust, Gauthier wasn't going to be resigned (not after they re-upped D Derek Morris and Reinprecht), and nor was O'Donnell.

They did get fair return on their crap -- a worthless C Joel Perrault, two second rounders, C Josh Gratton who will be Phoenix's main goon next year, a fourth round pick, and C Yannick Lehoux, who has all the goal scoring potential in the world but not much else.

The Coyotes also blew a third round pick for C Oleg Kvasha (from the Islanders) and a seventh round pick on D Jamie Rivers (from the Red Wings). For what reasons? Who knows. With Rivers he's at best their seventh dman. Can't tell me they don't have another young dman they'd like to ruin -- how about ruining Matthew Spiller some more? Chris McAllister isn't sucky enough? Kvasha doesn't even fit on their lines at all but that's no bother, the guy I've officially labeled a bust. Guy should have had a break out year by all accounts, instead he's 6-5, 230 of SUCK.

Didn't this roster look good at the beginning of the year? Now I can't look at it without having a bit of bile come up. Not that LW Ladislav Nagy's knee injury helped. Fire Greztky.

PITTSBURGH PENGUINS

Add a rejuvinated C Mario Lemieux, a phenom C Sidney Crosby, an offensive dman D Sergei Gonchar and two former top flight wingers in RW Mark Reechi and RW Ziggy Plaffy along with average G Jocelyn Thibault and people cummed themselves thinking the Penguins were going to get into the playoffs. Some even thought they'd win the Atlantic. At least they should have finished above the Rangers and Islanders.  Yet here we are again. Mario and Plaffy both abruptly retired, Reechi's dealt, Gonchar's been bust. At least Crosby as been every bit as good as advertised --although him and Alexander Ovechkin are raising the bar for rookies beyond where it should ever be.

Let the sell fest begin -- after we claim the hopeless C Andy Hilbert off waivers from Chicago. Reechi was first asked to waive his no trade clause to go help the Carolina Hurricanes win a Stanley Cup. All Pittsburgh has to show for it? C Krystofer Kolanos, who's a nice goal scorer than just doesn't score enough goals to out-weigh the fact that he's horrible in every other facet of the game, and RW Niklas Nodgren, who's never developed the scoring touch I thought he would and is nothing more than an average checker. At least a 2007 second round selection and the fact that Reechi might return to Pittsburgh as a free agent make this not a total waste.

The Penguins were also able to steal a fourth round pick out of the Red Wings for D Cory Cross, who's a servicable dman but not in anyone's long term plans. They were also able to flip slightly overrated D Ric Jackman to Florida for C Petr Taticek. Taticek was the 9th overall pick of his draft class -- yet he's done shit in the pros and should be getting the bust label fairly soon, if not already. Still with Jackman not in the Penguin plans, anything they might get out of Taticek either at the NHL level -- this year, or next -- or at the AHL level with the WBS Penguins will be more valuable than Jackman in the long run.

Crosby, John Leclair, Colby Armstrong, Tomas Surovy, Ryan Malone, Eric Boguniecki, Hilbert, Jani Rita, Nordgren, Konstantin Koltsov, Kolanos, Andre Roy, Matt Murley -- ouch.

SAN JOSE SHARKS

Despite grabbing C Joe Thornton, a franchise player, from the Bruins this team sits on the outside looking in of the playoffs -- 10th place. You'd expect them to do more but really what did you want them to do? Eight points is a lot to climb over so they jettisoned RW Niko Dimatrakos to Philadelphia for a third round pick. But they also picked up aggitator LW Ville Nieminen from the Rangers for a third round pick and supposedly for next season, although they do have to resign him still. He does at least add an abrasive look to the line-up and people hate playing against him. Sharks should hopefully bounce back next season. They've done it before.

ST LOUIS BLUES

Sitting in dead last of the conference, sell mode was on. Too bad the Blues really didn't have much that anyone wanted. C Doug Weight and C Mike Sillinger were already dealt. A deal that would have sent LW Dean McAmmond to Edmonton was nixed on a technicality. So all the Blues coughed up was vet D Eric Weinrich for fairly good return. A player the Blues weren't going to resign for a third round choice and young D Tomas Mojzis. Weinrich is still valuable but that just seems a bit much. Mojzis will be a future 4/5 for the Blues soon.

While the deal was good, not being able to find a taker on LW Keith Thachuk, RW Scott Young, RW Dallas Drake, and G Patrick Lalime stings a bit. Although I would have to change my low-opinion on GM Larry Pleau if he was able to sucker any body into taking anyone off this list (except maybe for Drake.) Then again Pleau got someone to take Boguniecki...albeit for D Steve Poapst in a trade that wasn't worth anyone's time.

 TAMPA BAY LIGHTNING

So much for the defending champions making a move despite being on the verge of missing the playoffs sitting in 7th. The team isn't bad but it just hasn't come together at the same time. At least one veteran dman or another winger would have been helpful. Both G Sean Burke and G John Grahame are picking the wrong time to play poor. I have a lot of respect for GM Jay Feaster, I consider him an upper GM, but this was unacceptable. Then again the salary cap and lack of draft picks did hurt his ability to swing a deal.

TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS

I hate the Maple Leafs, but let's face it -- the playoffs without Toronto to hate just aren't the playoffs. So I'm pulling for them. They were able to jettison RW Mariusz Czerkawksi (on waivers to Boston) and pick up C Aleksander Suglobov from New Jersey for D Ken Klee. They also were able to replace Klee with D Luke Richardson so it's all good.

Though you wish they either tore the team apart or went all the way out. GM John Ferguson Jr is getting a new asshole ripped by the fans and the media for this season and not making the blockbuster dream deals that are typical of the Toronto newspapers. Yeah, Tampa Bay will definitely deal you Vinny Lecalavier and Marty St. Louis for Aki Berg. Sure.

I still find Richardson servicable as 6/7 and they do add a 24 year old potential second line center in Suglobov. Amazing potential offensively and versatile, just needs more bulk and to stop taking stupid penalties -- something that will bury him in Toronto. Though he won't be in Toronto until next season.

As much as I want the Maple Leafs in the playoffs, to see them fail again, nothing JFJ did at the deadline was really going to get them in there so lay off him. And if you think you could have peddled anyone into taking the Maple Leaf garabage, then please, hit yourself in the head with a tack hammer. Say it with me, no one wants an injured Eric Lindros, or Clarke Wilm. No one is giving up their first round pick for Chad Kilger. Roman Kukumberg and Jeremy Williams are not enough to land you Rob Blake. Aki Berg isn't going to get you anything over a fifth rounder.

VANCOUVER CANUCKS

Busy guys of the day, bulking up a blueline devestated by injuries. Dmen coming in -- Eric Weinrich, Keith Carney, Juha Alen, Sean Brown. Also coming in G Mika Noronen. Going out, dmen Tomas Mojzis, Brett Skinner, Steve McCarthy, a fourth rounder, and two second round picks.

While Brown is only a stopgap until Ed Jovanovski, Matthias Ohlund and Sami Salo all come back, Carney will be an investment that will see ice time in the playoffs and might be worth resigning although something tells me he'll be on the UFA market anyway. Still he's been a shut down dman before and hard to play against. It's hard to give up Skinner but it's not like the Canucks don't have other young dmen coming up behind him. Alen is a wash as he's in Europe and probably not returning to this side of the Pond any time soon unless garuneteed an NHL job. Weinrich, despite being 39 still has legs and is capable as a third pairing guy, and with everyone healthy is an improvement over Nolan Baumgartner and Kevin Bieksa.

Noronen, traded from the goalie log-jam in Buffalo, is insurance in net but still you wonder who's going to be in net come the playoffs -- G Dan Cloutier, G Alex Auld, or Noronen? Most likely it's Auld with Noronen as the back up. Cloutier won't be back until mid-April from knee surgery and this might be the end of his era. Still again, Noronen's just insurance. Don't want Auld to go down too and have Maxime Ouellet in net for the first round.

 WASHINGTON CAPITALS

They'll finish probably in 14th out East but honestly how can you not call them winners in the trade deadline? Yeah, C Kris Beech's return is moot and he'll find himself playing in Italy or some other shit-stain league real soon, but you waited and waited on dealing D Brendan Witt and you got someone to cough up a first rounder -- Witt going to Nashville. You also found someone stupid enough to take LW Jeff Friesen for a second round pick. And not only take Friesen, someone who's had Friesen before. Friesen was a stopgap for the Capitals when LW Alexander Seymin told the Caps to go screw themselves and stayed in Europe for another season. He wasn't going to be brought back for a second season and ugh the season he did have has to rank as one of the most atrocious of all-time.

The team also picked up speedy C Rico Fata off waivers from Atlanta. Should play out the rest of the year on the Caps's fourth line, maybe killing a penalty or two and possibly auditioning for next year. Still looking for his first goal of the year though.

 CODA

Well it wasn't the greatest NHL trade deadline ever, but it was better than expected. Only a few moves can be said for sure as good ones. A lot of them are a bit iffy, but it's been fun. Clear cut winners and losers won't be known until the Cup is handed out. So check back then.

 

 

 

CHECK BACK THROUGH THE DAY FOR MORE BREAKDOWN OF THE NHL TRADE DEADLINE

It shocks me. I haven't posted a blog in over 18 months yet I still have people commenting on articles I did back in 2004 that are outdated. Go figure. But intrigue that I did have comments brought me back. So I figure it's not a bad thing. Sadly I don't have quite a clue what to write so consider this a musings column at the moment. First of all, I'll open with a tiny advertisement. I'm an inspiring young author and a comic book fan. I would like to get into the comic writing business but man, getting your foot in the door is a pain in the ass. Seeing as comics are a visual medium more than anything else, it's even harder to get into when your artistic skills with a pencil are as poor as mine. Doesn't matter how solid of a script you write, no one at DC or Marvel and most indies are going to look at it. Sad but true. So honestly, I need a colaberator to work with. An actual artist to aid in the creation of a graphic novel and to help me improve my comic storytelling. Been looking for someone for about two years now but no sure luck. Not too worried about style at the moment. I think I have at least one story to fit most types of style. I'll reveal more about the projects at a later date in order to pique some interest and to show I'm serious. Going back to comics, I am a comics fan and it is Wednesday, the day comics ship and hit shelves in most stores. After a nearly $40 romp last week, a light week was well deserved -- Infinite Crisis has been quite a drain on the wallet. Only things I wound up picking up were Teen Titans #33 and Mister Miracle #4. Other interesting things that came out American Virgin #1 (which I'll pick up in trade), Frankenstein #3 (which my store didn't get), Bomb Queen #2 (which I'll pick up in trade if it gets collected), Fell #4 (again something I'll get in trade) and Ultimate Spider-Man #91 (which always gets collected making single issues worthless). Yet as I mentioned, I only picked up two things so I had money burning in my pocket and after work I wound up picking up *gulp* Manga. [i]Shonen Jump[/i] to be exact. Yeah 360 pages for five bucks, can't beat it. I have nothing against Manga. I did do a report for a history course a couple semesters ago about the protrayal of women in manga and such so I picked up quite a bit of it for the report. I do have a couple Sgt. Frog and (dot)Hack mangas and until I gave them away to a couple kids, I did have a couple Shonen Jumps for the article but nothing in those really caught my eye. I picked up this one primarily for the One Piece arc contained within it. I dabble in Anime occasionally and I have a fairly small collection of it but lately I've been quite hooked on One Piece so that's what attracted me to it. I'll probably wind up reading it all -- Manga does read fast -- but I figured I'd ask if anyone out there had any suggestions or could say if any of the stuff is any good. There's The Prince of Tennis, a preview for D. Gray-Man, Shaman King, Hikaru No Go, Yu-Gi-Oh!: Millennium World. Well I expected this to be a bit longer but I'm out of time, but tomorrow (or Friday) I'll be back with more -- a look at the NHL trade deadline, the new X-Men trailer, my hopes for the upcoming Aquaman WB (er CW) TV series, and maybe more. Wont know until I sit down with it.

It shocks me. I haven't posted a blog in over 18 months yet I still have people commenting on articles I did back in 2004 that are outdated. Go figure. But intrigue that I did have comments brought me back. So I figure it's not a bad thing. Sadly I don't have quite a clue what to write so consider this a musings column at the moment. First of all, I'll open with a tiny advertisement. I'm an inspiring young author and a comic book fan. I would like to get into the comic writing business but man, getting your foot in the door is a pain in the ass. Seeing as comics are a visual medium more than anything else, it's even harder to get into when your artistic skills with a pencil are as poor as mine. Doesn't matter how solid of a script you write, no one at DC or Marvel and most indies are going to look at it. Sad but true. So honestly, I need a colaberator to work with. An actual artist to aid in the creation of a graphic novel and to help me improve my comic storytelling. Been looking for someone for about two years now but no sure luck. Not too worried about style at the moment. I think I have at least one story to fit most types of style. I'll reveal more about the projects at a later date in order to pique some interest and to show I'm serious. Going back to comics, I am a comics fan and it is Wednesday, the day comics ship and hit shelves in most stores. After a nearly $40 romp last week, a light week was well deserved -- Infinite Crisis has been quite a drain on the wallet. Only things I wound up picking up were Teen Titans #33 and Mister Miracle #4. Other interesting things that came out American Virgin #1 (which I'll pick up in trade), Frankenstein #3 (which my store didn't get), Bomb Queen #2 (which I'll pick up in trade if it gets collected), Fell #4 (again something I'll get in trade) and Ultimate Spider-Man #91 (which always gets collected making single issues worthless). Yet as I mentioned, I only picked up two things so I had money burning in my pocket and after work I wound up picking up *gulp* Manga. [i]Shonen Jump[/i] to be exact. Yeah 360 pages for five bucks, can't beat it. I have nothing against Manga. I did do a report for a history course a couple semesters ago about the protrayal of women in manga and such so I picked up quite a bit of it for the report. I do have a couple Sgt. Frog and (dot)Hack mangas and until I gave them away to a couple kids, I did have a couple Shonen Jumps for the article but nothing in those really caught my eye. I picked up this one primarily for the One Piece arc contained within it. I dabble in Anime occasionally and I have a fairly small collection of it but lately I've been quite hooked on One Piece so that's what attracted me to it. I'll probably wind up reading it all -- Manga does read fast -- but I figured I'd ask if anyone out there had any suggestions or could say if any of the stuff is any good. There's The Prince of Tennis, a preview for D. Gray-Man, Shaman King, Hikaru No Go, Yu-Gi-Oh!: Millennium World. Well I expected this to be a bit longer but I'm out of time, but tomorrow (or Friday) I'll be back with more -- a look at the NHL trade deadline, the new X-Men trailer, my hopes for the upcoming Aquaman WB (er CW) TV series, and maybe more. Wont know until I sit down with it.

It shocks me. I haven't posted a blog in over 18 months yet I still have people commenting on articles I did back in 2004 that are outdated. Go figure. But intrigue that I did have comments brought me back. So I figure it's not a bad thing. Sadly I don't have quite a clue what to write so consider this a musings column at the moment. First of all, I'll open with a tiny advertisement. I'm an inspiring young author and a comic book fan. I would like to get into the comic writing business but man, getting your foot in the door is a pain in the ass. Seeing as comics are a visual medium more than anything else, it's even harder to get into when your artistic skills with a pencil are as poor as mine. Doesn't matter how solid of a script you write, no one at DC or Marvel and most indies are going to look at it. Sad but true. So honestly, I need a colaberator to work with. An actual artist to aid in the creation of a graphic novel and to help me improve my comic storytelling. Been looking for someone for about two years now but no sure luck. Not too worried about style at the moment. I think I have at least one story to fit most types of style. I'll reveal more about the projects at a later date in order to pique some interest and to show I'm serious. Going back to comics, I am a comics fan and it is Wednesday, the day comics ship and hit shelves in most stores. After a nearly $40 romp last week, a light week was well deserved -- Infinite Crisis has been quite a drain on the wallet. Only things I wound up picking up were Teen Titans #33 and Mister Miracle #4. Other interesting things that came out American Virgin #1 (which I'll pick up in trade), Frankenstein #3 (which my store didn't get), Bomb Queen #2 (which I'll pick up in trade if it gets collected), Fell #4 (again something I'll get in trade) and Ultimate Spider-Man #91 (which always gets collected making single issues worthless). Yet as I mentioned, I only picked up two things so I had money burning in my pocket and after work I wound up picking up *gulp* Manga. [i]Shonen Jump[/i] to be exact. Yeah 360 pages for five bucks, can't beat it. I have nothing against Manga. I did do a report for a history course a couple semesters ago about the protrayal of women in manga and such so I picked up quite a bit of it for the report. I do have a couple Sgt. Frog and (dot)Hack mangas and until I gave them away to a couple kids, I did have a couple Shonen Jumps for the article but nothing in those really caught my eye. I picked up this one primarily for the One Piece arc contained within it. I dabble in Anime occasionally and I have a fairly small collection of it but lately I've been quite hooked on One Piece so that's what attracted me to it. I'll probably wind up reading it all -- Manga does read fast -- but I figured I'd ask if anyone out there had any suggestions or could say if any of the stuff is any good. There's The Prince of Tennis, a preview for D. Gray-Man, Shaman King, Hikaru No Go, Yu-Gi-Oh!: Millennium World. Well I expected this to be a bit longer but I'm out of time, but tomorrow (or Friday) I'll be back with more -- a look at the NHL trade deadline, the new X-Men trailer, my hopes for the upcoming Aquaman WB (er CW) TV series, and maybe more. Wont know until I sit down with it.